Not Feeling It

The open pathways. The closed doors. Jim blocks my creative outlet. He doesn’t want me to tell this story. My children were slaughtered. Not real children but metaphorical children. I know, I’m crazy. It just doesn’t make sense, my telling this story. We built a castle in the sky and that devastated me. Natalie and I developed the Coolani language so we could expedite the process. She took the needle for me, She is my soldier. Natalie P. knows I’m out there. So does Thom. So does Jim. I need to tell ‘myself’ that. They say they’ll get me in April. I’ve said that a million times. The medical system doesn’t care for people like me, they just bully me and force medication in excess on me. I take the medication now because I’m not overdosed anymore. Six years of hell, with some joy. Da da da. The blanket truth hurts sometimes, often really.